13: Matter of Trust

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It was the first birthday party I’d ever had that I could remember. My dad never bothered and I didn’t really see anything to celebrate as I got older. My birthday was always overshadowed by the loss of my mother. I was trying not to think about it too much. The night was about fun, and so far I was having a lot of it. I was happy that Kennedy had invited Ginger, Sahara and Kaia. It was also nice to meet some of Eric’s friends, especially Tawny, who currently had me sitting with her while we snacked on some delicious catered Mexican food.

“So I’m sure you get asked this all the time, but how do you get into movies?” I sipped my super tasty Wild Rose. I wasn’t sure what, exactly, was in the drink other than strawberries and Cointreau.

“I met a guy that was trying to start his own porn production company and needed talent,” she told me. “I like sex, so I agreed to do it. Turns out I’m pretty good at it. Has Eric tried to talk you into it?” She took a sip of her own drink.

“He’s suggested I’d be good for it, but I don’t know. I think I’d have to try out home video porn first, you know?”

“I can see that. I think you’d look really good on film,” she told me. “I’d even help you pop your cherry.”

I laughed and said, “I think Eric would have a problem with that.”

“Are you kidding me?” she laughed too. “Eric would film it.”

“You think so?” He was dancing with Kennedy and Jessica. He was still wearing the G-string.

“He’s all about girl on girl action,” she snickered. “I don’t know how he would feel about seeing you with me since I’ve never seen him with a girl he likes as much as he likes you, but I promise nothing gets him hard faster than watching two chicks go at it.”

“Really?” We hadn’t discussed it. I believed her, though. Girl on girl stuff was a huge turn-on for a lot of men. Then I thought back to the night he and Ras were at the club. He’d definitely enjoyed watching Kennedy and me together.

“Yes, really. Have you ever asked him?”

“No, I haven’t. I’m probably opening Pandora’s box here, but I’ve never had sex with a girl,” I confessed. I practically saw the jackpot alarm going off in her head.

“You haven’t, huh? Sweetheart, you don’t know what you’re missing. If you think Eric gives good head, you should let me try it and show you how it should really be done.”

I laughed and said, “I’ll take that into consideration. He’s pretty fucking good at giving head.”

“Believe me, I know. He’s actually the best man I know at it,” she said. She leaned over to whisper, “Imagine how good my tongue would feel massaging your clit while he fucked you.” She straightened up and took another sip of her cocktail.

It was an enticing offer. Eric’s eyes caught mine and he came over to the table we were sitting at.

“Tawny is trying to talk me into a threeway,” I told him.

I heard a quiet groan. “Have you ever been with a woman?” he asked me. He made me stand up long enough for him to sit in my seat and he pulled me onto his lap.

“Nothing below the waist. Kennedy and I have groped each other and made out a few times because it gets the customers going,” I explained. It was a gay for pay kind of thing. In my personal life I didn’t pursue other women.

“Is it something you’ve been curious about?” His big hand rubbed over my inner thigh. Tawny noticed.

“I told her I lick pussy better than you do. I don’t know if she’s buying it,” Tawny smiled.

“You do a damn good job, baby.” I kissed his cheek. “I have no complaints.”

“I appreciate it,” he chuckled. “I have seen Tawny make women cum faster than I can.” He kissed my neck. “It’s your call, but I would be down for whatever you want tonight.”

I leaned down to whisper, “I just want you.”

He turned my head to catch my lips in a long, lingering peck. His hand slid a little further under my skirt.

“I’m all yours, Lover,” he whispered back when the kiss broke.

“Sookie says we might need five minutes alone in your bedroom.” I was sure he could feel that my panties were damp.

“As you wish.” He pushed my panties aside so he could stroke my lower lips.

“You sure I can’t join you?” Tawny asked with a hopeful smile.

“There’s plenty of other pussy here to play with,” I pointed out.

“You have the best pussy,” Eric whispered into my ear as he pushed his middle finger into my core.

I moaned and bit my lip. In my peripheral vision I knew Tawny was watching. She was probably disappointed when Eric pulled his finger out from under my skirt and sucked it clean.

“Maybe we need ten minutes,” I said. He had The Look in his eyes. My ovaries were tap dancing.

Eric stood up, making sure I was on my feet first.

“We’ll be back.” He leaned down to give Tawny a quick, platonic kiss. He rubbed his hand over my ass to guide me back to his room. He threw the lock before he pushed that silly little g-string down, leaving his hard dick bare.

“What does Sookie say now?” He started stroking himself.

“Sookie says bend me over the bed and fuck me hard,” I said. I was three drinks in and feeling pretty damn good. An orgasm wasn’t going to hurt. At all.

Eric turned me around so he could walk me to the bed. He pushed the middle of my back to fold me over the bed. Eric pulled my skirt up and pushed my panties down.

“You don’t mind walking around your party with my cum dripping down your inner thighs?” He rubbed his thick up and down through my folds.

“No sir.”

“Mmm, good girl.” His big hands rubbed around my ass as he slowly slid into me, filling me completely. Eric swiveled his hips some, grinding against me. After a moment he grabbed onto my hips, held me in place, and started to do as I requested. His hips slapped against my ass again and again as he fucked me. His was driving in hard, getting really fucking deep.

He released my ass after a moment, slapped my right cheek, before he reached up to grab my throat. He lifted my head, making my back arch, and fucked me even harder. It was exactly what I wanted and both of us probably needed.

The proof of it was it didn’t take long for either of us to cum, and when we did he had to hold me up.

“That was perfect,” I smiled.

“Yes it was,” he replied with the same smile. He was panting a little. “Happy birthday, Lover.”

“Thank you. Do we have to go back out there?” I could have happily stayed in bed with him.

“It’s Sookie Says day,” he grinned. “If you want to stay in here, we can. My only worry is the orgy that’s likely to be happening when we finally leave the room.”

“It would probably be rude to stay in– wait, do you want to be part of an orgy?” I wasn’t upset if he did. “Tawny said two girls together is your favorite thing.”

“Uh…” He chuckled a little before finally saying, “Two girls together is definitely a favorite. It’s not something I have to have, though. If it’s not your thing I wouldn’t try to talk you into it.”

“Would you want to see me with another girl?” I was pretty sure I knew the answer to that.

“Yes,” he answered without hesitation. I could see the lust cloud his face when he thought about it.

“So if I was to bring Tawny in here…”

“I’d be solid as a fucking rock before the door was even closed,” he chuckled.

“Good to know,” I smiled. I tilted my head to kiss him. I wasn’t sure I was prepared to give sex with a girl a chance, but I could think about it. Eric’s birthday wasn’t too far off. Maybe I could make that his present. I’d have to talk to Tawny about it and see what her schedule was. “We should probably get back out there.”

“As you wish.” He kissed my cheek before he rolled off of me.

I got up off the bed. Eric located some regular clothes and I straightened out my dress. He wasn’t kidding about his cum coating my thighs. I was going to have to clean up some before we went back out to join everyone else. Staying in Eric’s room had its appeal, but it was the first birthday party I’d had since before my mom died. I was going to enjoy it in case it was the last.


What I wanted to do was go home and pass the fuck out. I’d gotten some sleep, but another couple of hours would have been nice. That wasn’t happening, though. When I got home it was time to take Hadley to rehab. The rehab had called on Thursday to tell her they would have a bed available on Saturday instead of Sunday. Hadley jumped on it, and I was excited for her. Getting her checked into rehab was well worth missing a few hours of sleep. Kennedy pulled into the driveway at a little after ten. Hadley had said she could check into the rehab any time after noon. It was going to take a while to load up and drive down to Malibu, and I needed to drink a lot of coffee before we left.

“Man, I could sleep for a week,” I said when we got out of the car. Kennedy left her Lexus parked in the driveway. She had plans to drive up the coast to Monterey for the holiday. It was as good a place as any to spend the Fourth of July.

“No kidding. Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you guys?”

“I’m sure. Hadley barely wants me to take her down there.”

“Well I hope this place is as good as she says it is and it’s not one of those bullshit spas calling itself rehab,” she said.

Kennedy popped the trunk so I could get the gifts out of there. She followed me to the front door. The steps never felt like so many as they did right then.

I stopped suddenly when I realized that the door wasn’t completely shut. That was weird.

I pushed it open and called out to Hadley. My house smelled like stale smoke, like Hadley had been chain-smoking in there all night. I very specifically told her I didn’t want strangers in my house, and there was still no smoking or drug use allowed.

“It stinks like a fucking ashtray in here,” Kennedy complained.

“Had! You here?” I expected her to answer or appear at the top of the stairs or something. Leaving her alone made me a little anxious, just because I didn’t know if she had anyone following her or ties to shady shit she hadn’t told me about. “Hadley?” I called out again, heading toward my bedroom.

When I got there I stopped. My heart sank immediately. Two of three panels of curtains were hanging at odd angles. The closet doors were all open. Clothes and shoes were strewn about. The TV was gone. So was the iPod dock. My bedding was destroyed with… God, I didn’t even know what it was. Mud? Shit? Tears stung my eyes.

“Sookie!” Kennedy yelled from upstairs. I was afraid to move. If my bedroom was such a mess, I didn’t even want to see upstairs.


I went to the stairs that led down to her room and went to check on her. I’d never had a break in before, but there was a first time for everything. If she was hurt, she needed help. I would never forgive myself if something happened to her while I was out partying.

Except when I got to Hadley’s room it was empty. Her things were gone. The bed was made and it was like she had never been there. Or so I thought. When I turned the full 360 to check out the room I noticed the message written on the mirror in lipstick.

Thanx 4 everything.

That did it. I burst into tears.

Devastation was only the beginning of what I felt. It was beyond betrayal. I let out a scream that didn’t even sound like me. It was like every hurt that had been visited on me came to the surface at once, and it all wanted out.

Why did everyone I trusted want to hurt me? People who were supposed to love me always fucked me over. Always. All I wanted to do was help her and she used me.

Goddamnit! Why bother trying to be a good person when this was the result.

“What happened?” Kennedy came running into the room. I sank to my knees and cried. “That cunt,” she said angrily. “Honey, come on, we have to get out of here and call the police.”

I couldn’t move. I was crying too hard and lost in my own turbulent sea of emotions to think straight. Kennedy practically had to pick me up off the concrete floor. Somehow I ended up outside on the back patio while she called 9-1-1 to report the burglary. I sat there feeling like a damn fool. Eric had warned me and I hadn’t listened. I believed Hadley’s story.

I was a fucking idiot.

For a moment I looked at the roof and contemplated jumping. It seemed like a much more fitting way to spend my day than explaining to some detectives why I had opened up my home to a heroin addict. Stupid. Stupid. STUPID.

Kennedy came out to sit with me while we waited for the police to show up.

“They said not to touch anything,” she told me. “Crime scene guys are going to dust the house for prints and whatever. I’m so sorry, sweetie.”

I sniffled and wiped my face.

“Why does this shit happen to me, Kennedy? Why is it that every fucking time I think my life is getting better, something like this happens? Am I that bad of a person? I really must have been awful in my last life,” I said.

“No, sweetie, that’s not it. You’re a good person. You’re kind and generous, even after all the shitty things you’ve been through. The one thing they can’t take is your heart. You are the strongest woman I have ever met, and what your cousin did is despicable, but it’s not your fault. You were doing a good deed and she took advantage of your big heart. Don’t you dare punish yourself for it,” she said.

Too late.

“I’m so stupid, Kennedy.”

She pulled me into a hug and let me cry. We were still huddled together and I was still questioning my intelligence when the police arrived. I had to pull it together to answer their questions and tell them what was missing. Thankfully I had good homeowner’s insurance. I just hoped it would cover my stupid decision to let Hadley stay with me. If it didn’t, I was in deep shit. I might end up in porn after all.

I was too busy talking to the police to call Eric and tell him what had happened. Crime scene techs arrived to take pictures and do whatever else they did. Kennedy had taken a ton of pictures as well so I could send them to my insurance company. In addition to my ransacked bedroom, the TV, stereo, speakers, Blu-ray player, and all of my electronics were missing. My iPod, iPad, laptop, Gopro camera, and the Bluetooth speakers I took outdoors when I had company were all gone.

Thousands of dollars in damage had been done. My couches were ripped up and had cigarette burns, there was spray paint on the walls, hardware had been ripped off my kitchen drawers and cabinets, and several windows had been broken. How no one heard the glass shatter I’d never know. My house was ruined.

The worst part was going through my belongings in my bedroom. Of course my jewelry was gone. Including my mother’s Tiffany’s necklace. It was the only thing I would save if there was a fire, and it was gone. Hadley knew how important that necklace was to me. That was the real knife in my heart. I’d told her what that necklace meant to me and she took it.

If she wouldn’t have taken that, the rest wouldn’t have hurt so much. That necklace was the only tangible link I had to my mother. It was everything to me and she stole it.

While I was devastated, Eric was furious.

“That fucking bitch,” he growled in a menacing tone from behind me. I didn’t even know he had shown up. Kennedy must have called him. I could see his jaw grinding and his face was turning red from the anger.

There was a lot of cleanup ahead of me. I was going to have to get someone out to replace the window and I didn’t know how long I was going to have to wait because of the insurance bullshit.

“We’re changing your locks and putting in a security system,” he said. Eric’s tone left no room for argument, and the way I was feeling right then I wasn’t in the mood for it. I loved my house, but at that moment I didn’t feel safe in it. Even with Eric there.

“She took my mom’s necklace,” I told him. That elicited another growl. Eric knew that necklace was important to me. By then I was numb. I had to be. If I wasn’t numb to it I was going to completely fall apart and I had to keep it together, at least until the police left.

“You can stay with me until you can live here again,” Eric offered. “As long as it takes.”

“That’s sweet, but I don’t want her chasing me out of my house. I don’t want to leave.” I’d lost enough in my life. I wasn’t the type of person to run away from the things that scared me.

Maybe I was an idiot.

Maybe I was brave.

Maybe it was a combination of the two.

Eric pulled me into a hug. That hug did more to heal me than I wanted to admit. I needed it more than I knew. For those few seconds he was holding me I felt better, like I could get through the latest disaster in my life. All I needed was him.

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13 thoughts on “13: Matter of Trust

  1. Damn. She didn’t have to trash the place; guess she had to direct her unresolved anger somewhere. Her thank you note was an especially nice touch. Poor Sookie, no wonder it’s so hard for her to trust. Poor kid.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I just read chapter 15 over again and it made me cry. So there’s that. Sookie just can’t catch a break. I really don’t envy her in a lot of ways. It’s a good thing she’s not an addict or she’d probably be back on her drug of choice right about now.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. The last chapter was everything . When a person can provide that kind of comfort and security after that kind of shit storm…it’s love. I feel horrible for Sookie , but mostly because of her mom’s necklace because it can’t be replaced . I hope Sookie will still have positive feelings about her birthday .


  3. Oh that two faced bitch!! I had a bad feeling she was going to end up stealing Sookie’s necklace😡 I hope they catch her but she’s probably fenced all of the stuff by now. Maybe they’ll be able to track down the necklace at a pawn shop. I’m glad Sookie didn’t push Eric away, I was kinda waiting for her to but maybe she’s coming to see that Eric is the one person who won’t hurt her. Thanks for the update!


  4. God, she won’t be able to enjoy her birthday for a long, long time. I have to wonder if maybe it wasn’t Hadley but the person she was getting drugs from. The cleanliness of her room contrasted to the damage done elsewhere makes me question if Hadley left to go to rehab herself and someone else broke in…
    Thankfully she has Eric and didn’t try to push him away in her grief and anger. He’s there to stay and she’ll realize that soon. Thanks for great chapter.


  5. Sookie’s birthday party was a blast and she even gained an idea for Eric’s birthday in a few months. Going home was terrible I knew Hadley would do this especially on this night. It wasn’t just that she’s a junkie, but she’s jealous. More or less Sookie and Hadley had the same horrible beginnings and Hadley became a junkie whore and Sookie just became a stripper. A successful stripper with a handsome boyfriend and a few friends. Everything Hadley couldn’t do and probably could never do. A jealous junkie, what a blend?


  6. Oh Crap. That was worse than I thought.
    The vandalism? Why? OMG! I’m with Eric! Fuming!!!

    Poor Sookie. I can’t imagine how she’d handle this without him there. Even still, I think he’s got his work cut for him. What a birthday 😢


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